Joke of the Day

EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 50

Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of
room at each side. With a 5-lb potato sack in each hand, extend your
arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you
can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax. Each day you'll find
that you can hold this position for just a bit longer.

After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb potato sacks. Then try 50-lb potato sacks and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a
100-lb potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more
than a full minute. (I'm at this level.)

After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the
sacks.

ITALIAN LOGIC

An old Italian Mafia "Don" is dying and he calls his grandson to his bed. "Lissin-a me. I wanna for you to taka my chrome plated 38 revolver so you always remember me."

"But grandpa, I really don't lika guns. Howz about you leava me your Rolex watch instead?"

"Shuddup an'a lissin. Somma day you gonna runna DA business. You gonna have a beautifula wife, lotsa money, a bigga home and maybe a couple a bambinos.
Somma day you gonna comma home and maybe find your wife inna bed with another man. Whadda you gonna do then ... Pointa to you watch and say,
Times up."